Jumping Back In: Online Dating Profiles--- Reading is FUNdaMENTAL

Last week I blogged about my foray into online dating and how to write a profile. Read that blog here.

In keeping with the theme of profiles, let's talk about ACTUALLY READING them. We all know the joke that men don't read instructions or directions. The reason it is so funny is that there is a large element of truth to it. Come on, you are nodding your head right now in agreement. Guys you know you are sometimes (being polite here) guilty of it or have buds who are and ladies well… we've all been there.

Profiles are your chance to make an impression and weed through or help someone weed through the pile. It gives the other person directions on which way to go in getting to know you or not.

So the first rule, gentleman is complete the profile!

I see too many men who have not taken the time to complete the standard categories. These are tell us about yourself. What are you looking for? And "I'd like to add". We don't need War & Peace but give us something to go on.

I appreciate those who tell me enough about themselves to get past the first decision point.

Then BEFORE you send a "Let's chat" … Second rule: read MY profile.

No offense, but if you are a Ultra-conservative, God-fearing Christian, who loves to hunt and thinks that movies, live theater and reading are just "okay" then you should not be sending me a "flirt". There is definitely no match there with a music, movie loving, semi-pagan, author/editor. Especially if you are from Arkansas and I'm from New Jersey and I clearly spell out in my profile that due to having an elderly ailing father that I am unable to travel far or relocate. DUH!

I will however read your profile (as evidenced by my comment above) and send you a polite "Thank you. I wish you luck in your search".Hmmm I sound like an employer or agent/publisher.

            When they say online dating is a numbers game, they don't mean send out a million flirts and see what sticks. That is dating spam.

What it means is there are a million profiles out there for you to review and then select which ones seem to be a bit simpatico and then decide if you want to send that flirt or message.

I have so far been impressed with only one gentleman from Virginia who messaged me to say that he was sorry we did not live closer and that he understood my caregiver dilemma as he had cared for his aged mother.

That information about geography is at the very end of my profile. So he had read all the way through. I thanked him for that and told him that I genuinely hoped he would find what he sought.

Next week: What catches my eye in your profile and what doesn't.

Thursday Reads: Darkness Dawns

Happy Thursday!

                Sorry for the absence, like many this time of year I have been out of sorts.  But while I was, I read a terrific book.:  Darkness Dawns by Dianne Duvall.

Once, Sarah Bingham’s biggest challenge was making her
students pay attention in class. Now, after rescuing a
wounded stranger, she’s landed in the middle of a battle
between corrupt vampires and powerful immortals who also
need blood to survive. Roland Warbrook is the most
compelling man Sarah has ever laid hands on. But his
desire for her is mingled with a hunger he can
barely control . . .

In his nine centuries of immortal existence, no woman
has tempted Roland as much as Sarah. But asking her to
love him is impossible -- when it mean forfeiting the world
she’s always known, and the life he would do anything
to protect.

Darkness Dawns is the first in her Immortal Guardians paranormal romance series that will introduce readers to more such warriors and take readers along on their journey as they endeavor to discover the truth behind their existence, encounter powerful new beings and face increasingly complex challenges spawned by an escalating number of formidable foes. 

I give it a 5-fangs rating.  It is well written and paced with just the right mix of action and hot romance and sex.  Sarah is well written as the heroine who because of her integrity finds herself in a very different world from her University teaching position.  My one tiny issue was Sarah’s gift, I hadn’t seen that coming.  Maybe I missed that scene.  Dianne’s world-building is intriguing in her injection of environmental issue.  But you’ll have to see for yourself.

Check Dianne and Darkness Dawns on her website www.dianneduvall.com .